Wednesday, October 29, 2014

October 29, 2014 - Attraction to your friend

       Thank you for joining me this evening.  We are here to have a little fun, share ideas and talk like adults.  The scenario that follows is not intended to resemble anyone I know.  If it does it is purely coincidental.   I hope my stories/questions are inviting enough that you will join in the conversation.  With that being said lets have fun exchanging some words…..

       
       You are married or in your committed relationship.  Things with you and your significant other are going ok; there are no serious issues but things could be better.  While going about your days you find yourself noticing a friend.  You two have casual conversation and to your surprise you find yourself interested and falling for this friend.  As a little time passes your significant other starts to notice a change in you and asks you what’s up.  Do you tell them about your attraction to your friend or do you just brush it off as something else? 

10 comments:

  1. Hell naw Tracy! LOL If your relationship is already in a "so-so" state there is no need to make it worse by telling him/her that you have an attraction to someone else.

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    1. KeepQuiet I hear you!! lol. I agree, no need to make thing worse. Just dont act on that attraction! Thanks for your words.

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  2. Be honest and work through your issues

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    1. Nope!!! K.D. your attraction is not the issue, why bring it up? Thanks for your words.

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  3. butusayshesjustafriend :-)October 29, 2014 at 10:11 PM

    I don't know. If the issues in the relationship are not serious, then there is the possibility that things can improve and get back on track. People think the grass is greener on the other side, but they haven't tried watering their own.

    Now if I was TRULY falling for the friend and the friend felt the same and I felt that we could have something strong, something real...I would pray on it. No need to express the attraction to your s/o if you aren't going to move forward with pursuing it.

    Not everyone can handle honesty. Some people could handle their s/o telling them about their attraction to someone else. They wouldn't like it, but they would appreciate the honesty. Most people would not be able to handle it.

    This is a hard question. There is no one answer...

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    1. Butyousayhejustafriend I agree, no need to tell it. Bringing this up could make a bad situation even worse. The attraction will be in the background in even if /when your attraction fades. Thanks for your words.

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    2. butyousayshesjustafriend :-)October 30, 2014 at 3:48 PM

      Attraction and falling for someone is different. We are all human and no one, not even those in great relationships can deny feeling attracted to another man/woman at some point in time. Falling for someone...that's another level, especially if the feelings are real.

      Say nothing...if you are able to work things out in your relationship...good! If things don't work out, and you decide to move on with the friend...that's your prerogative too. But there would still be no reason to add gasoline to the fire by mentioning the attraction. If you are truly in tune with your s/o...they already know something is up and are just waiting for you to tell them. Remember the scene from 'Why Did I get Married Too' with Tyler Perry and Sharon Leal's characters...O_o

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  4. Would I tell my significant other? NO! Why complicate things? Even though being honest is best but at the same time your honesty can cause a rift in that relationship. Now you are bringing in insecurities, mistrust, jealousy and so many emotions that were not there to begin with.
    However, what I would do is fix my relationship so it would not be in a so-so state and pray to God to help me and guide me to not feel a certain way towards a friend.
    And if I decide that the feeling I have for my friend is more than just that, then I would definitely let him know with the intentions of moving forward with my friend but if there's no need then there really is no reason to say anything.

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    1. Monica I agree about being honest but telling my s/o about an attraction you have that you are not acting on....NOT! As long as I have no plans of moving forward with the friend or getting out of my committed relationship I would say nothing. Thanks for your words young lady

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  5. I would be quiet and not say anything because like you said it's only an attraction that doesn't mean that you're acting on it or try to get with that person and instead I would definitely work on my relationship to get it out of that state

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